Liz Strauss.com

Taking time to think things through when we’re in a rush, it’s best, difficult. It’s even harder when what propels us is a grand and great idea. When that great idea is meant in self-giving generosity, we sometimes cannot see how others might not value what we have to offer.

That’s when we really need to STOP. BREATHE. THINK THINGS THROUGH.

People are often mistrusting of a positive, particularly from someone they don’t know well. They have two natural responses, one is to assume flaws — Where is the hidden catch? The other is what some call the lottery mentality — I Want Mine Gimme More. Both responses come from a place of weakness inspired by the generosity and fear that it might not be really meant for someone as [fill in the blank here] as they are.

Folks feel a whole lot better if they earn what they receive. With a transaction they can point to, the gift then makes sense. The transaction, no matter how simple, says that they deserve the gift and can count on keeping the prize that has been bestowed upon them.

No one likes to win something, only to feel they don’t deserve it, that it might be taken from them, or even worse, that the giver might want something in return that hasn’t yet been stated out loud. All of these possibilities make folks insecure.

Insecurity makes folks do things they wouldn’t normally do.

They do things like ask their readers to vote them to the top of a list (while pushing other folks down) on a list that was meant to shed light on new blogs and show gratitude for the bloggers’ work.

It’s easy to get to that sort of misbehavior without thinking. It’s hard to take back such actions once they’re done, especially when eager helpers hurt others in your cause.

When someone offers you a gift, be gracious. Say “thank you.” STOP. BREATHE. THINK THINGS THROUGH before you try to make the gift into something that it’s not
Liz Strauss

Recently a list called the Z-List Meme was circulated. It was started to acknowledge blogs of substance that folks might not know. The idea was to take the list, add to it, and post it on your blog. That would give these blogs a little push in the rankings and more readership.

Seth Godin raised the bar a bit when he put one version of the list on Squidoo and added a feature in which folks could vote for the blog or blogs that they found particularly useful. What happened next doesn’t seem to be what was intended. One blogger, at least, went on a full-out campaign to “stuff the ballot box.”

The blog in question has tagline that reads

“The new currency is trust, authenticity, and a good story.”

One blogger added her blog as folks were invited to. But I shy from linking directly to the post where she gives directions to her readers on how exactly to vote, for her blog, but you can find it at http://kimklaverblogs.blogspot.com/2006/12/new-school-blog-queen-for-day.html

Some might call this fun or good marketing. I call it asking your readers to do something they don’t need to. Blatant self-promotion makes me wonder if I were to hire you, who’s agenda would come first mine or yours? I’m thinking you would be thinking of you.

Copywrite, Ink. had somewhat the same reaction as I do.

Unfortunately, one blogger felt otherwise, turning the true spirit of Godin’s post into a case study that is similar to the challenges Reddit experienced a few months ago when overzealous marketing types voted their articles up and other articles down. However, unlike the Reddit stacking, Kim Klaver and a handful of her readers were less than anonymous. On her blog, which I won’t link to, she wrote: “If we push it to #1, I’ll take a screenshot pronto and post it here. We’ll be ‘Queen for a day.’”

Her marketing tactic worked, driving several readers to vote and then report her blog’s progress. In fact, they voted hers up and other blogs down, enough so, that one commenter on her blog finally wrote: “You know, sending an email out in order to ask for votes is really quite lame. … Deceptive if you ask me. Isn’t this the very thing you preach against?” Obviously not.

“I don’t mind asking for votes though, since people can do it or not. I might even send out another email, so be forewarned…hehehe,” Klaver replied. “If the blog writers didn’t tell their readers about the popularity contest, how would they know and how could they help their favorite writers?”

Klaver seems to have missed the point of the post entirely. It was never meant to be a popularity contest . . .

The most basic Internet tracking reveals the story behind her empty victory; many blogs were voted down despite never being visited. It is a shame, because I visited many of those blogs today and several were worthwhile despite being voted down.

What did she win? She probably won some readers who didn’t know her — other bloggers. She’ll keep the kind who believe that marketing can be won by such tactics. They’re the same kids who vote for Jr. High President and Homecoming Queen.

It’s fair to think that she lost the reader who called it lame and deceptive and any reader who thinks as that reader does.

Don’t put yourself in the Ballot Box for fun or promotional reasons. It can only backfire with people who don’t know you.

Let other folks decide you belong there.

Liz Strauss

When someone asks how you feel, your answer actually makes a difference to how you feel. Your brain believes you. Say you are well, and well, you are. It happens almost that fast. You start to think well thoughts. “Hey, I don’t feel so bad really.” You don’t want what you just said to be untrue, after all.

Add a smile to that picture and something even bigger happens. Bob Sutton wrote about the effect of smiling , and his text is backed by rigorous research.

‘“There is now compelling evidence that smiling causes people to feel happy. Requiring people to smile, no matter how they really feel at first, results in increased positive feelings; frowning conversely decreases positive feelings. Robert Zajonc and his colleagues show that smiling leads to physiological changes in the brain that cool the blood, which in turn makes people feel happy. . . . These researchers also found direct effects of temperature on emotion, demonstrating that people who have had cold air blown up their noses are happier than those who have had hot air blown up their noses. Hundreds of other studies show that hot temperatures are a powerful and reliable cause of foul moods and interpersonal conflict (especially aggression and violence).

So, if you want to be really weird, try increasing happiness (and thus creativity) by having your people say “ah, ah, ah,” “e, e ,e, e,” or perhaps saying “cheese” over and over again, blowing cold air up their noses, or just keeping the buildings cold where creative people work. Or as Jane Dutton at The University of Michigan told me after she heard Robert Zajonc talk about these ideas: “When I want to get in a good mood, I’ll just go home and stick my head in the refrigerator.”’

The moral seems to be if you see unhappy folks, you’re okay to tell them gently to stick their heads in a refrigerator.

Liz Strauss

Time Magazine put us on the cover. They say we are the PERSON of the YEAR 2006. At first, it seemed an easy answer. Then I read a bit of what was behind the covers. There were stories about ordinary individuals who make up the virtual of user-generated content.

Red Write Web describes the Time Person of the Year Choice well

It’s no accident that Time magazine choose YOU as their Person of the Year. In 2006, the Web was all about the social. User generated content was king this year - and the Time editor in chief is betting that the impact of this will be felt for years to come. In this article, just in time for last minute holiday shopping madness, we look at how the social aspects of the Web are transforming online shopping.

But we’ve been saying for some time that everything on the Internet is backward. Take care that the YOU that we are doesn’t start to buy into our own PR.

Off the charts online shopping ($600 Million+ daily) tailored to niche needs of the most minute flavors doesn’t mean that one voice is louder than others. Each of us is still one in a crowd of millions being bombarded with messages and attempts for our attention.

Be the Person of the Year in the way that you listen. Family, friends, coworkers, and people we don’t know will immediately respond to a show of pure attention.

It’s not only great business, it’s the sign of a great person.

I hope every wish and wonder of the holidays to enjoy!

Liz Strauss